The Holidays (which ends up as an excessive drinking binge thus, turning into “the holidaze”) are just around the corner! If youre like me, and you love picking out gifts for members of your family and friends and significant others (f*** you, by the way), then you have most likely started your shopping list already. There are a few people though, on your list, that we all struggle to buy for - Do I even buy this person a gift? Are we THAT close? I don’t want to make them feel awkward if they didn’t give me a present (if that’s the case than we definitely are no longer friends / never were friends) - like your significant others’ parents / sister, your distant cousin, the guy/girl you see occasionally/on a regular basis, your mail man, your housekeeper, the girl youre kind of friends with but lets be honest its more like frenemies and you don’t want her to one up you so you should definitely get her a present and it better be good… yeah, gift giving gets tough. Sadly, I cannot help you there.
However, what I can help you with is picking the right gift for that one lush in your life. Why can I help you? Let’s just say, I have deep insight to what lushes want.
Through experience I’ve learned that I lushes only want one thing, other than alcohol of course. And that is to drink while being classy. So here, I offer you a few classy gift ideas for that lovely lush in your life.
Kate Spade Hiballs, $100. As I said before, all a lush wants is to get drunk in the classiest way possible. Prosecco, champagne, etc. However, if you love your henny & gingerales and G&Ts, then I would highly suggest these glasses. It eases the guilt when you finish off your 2nd vodka tonic, but you realize, “hey you know, its not that bad… I’m drinking from kate spade glassware, things are looking up”. #classydrunk
Rayban Wayfarers, $145. For most, being hungover means bloodshot eyes and light sensitivity. Treat your lush to this lifesaver.
Kingsley Amis’ Everyday Drinking, $19.99. Every lush needs something that says… Yes I drink, but I’m serious about it. So serious I have a book about it, okay? I know what I’m doing. I mean business. Written by one of the finest British novelists ever, this is the epitome of classy drinking. Here you have it. This shows you are a sophisticated drinker and well read. Your lush will certainly appreciate this fine gift.
Skymall Wine Glass Holder Necklace, $24.95. I am a huge fan of this. I’ve already featured this on my blog before, because, truth be told, its amazing. How can you go wrong with this? You really can’t.
LUSH Ponche Shower Gel, $34.90. Okay, so I may be biased, as I used to work for LUSH, but this is a great gift for the lush in your life. For starters, you’re not encouraging their drinking habit with this one. It says, Hey, I know you love alcohol. But I’m not about to cater to that, so instead, purify yourself with some soap. No one wants to be the enabler (right?). With a shot of tequila in this shower gel , the receiver still gets their fix, without the after effects. In fact, this is doubles as a great hangover cure, I’m sure.
Baggy Winecoat, $56. When youre slappin the bag you want a classy way to do it. Why not in this leather tote that you can disguise as a purse, but comes in handy when in need? Your lush friend can load this up with their favorite wine, and take it anywhere! Parties, meetings, work, class, even the gym! This redefines a pick me up. Franzia is so out of style.
BevMo Gift Card, any dollar amount. You are GOLDEN with this one. Works for anyone (even the non-lushes) – and like any gift card, the amount changes depending on
what this person has done for you how close you are to this person. $10 means, okay this is an obligatory gift… knock yourself out. $25 means hey, youre pretty special to me, but not special enough for me to actually buy you an actual present instead of this lousy gift card. $50 means we’re probably getting married, the commitment level to gift giving and devotion to this person here is outrageous. $100 probably means, hey, I screwed up this year. Sorry? Lets call it even. So like I said, gift cards are the cure all – but beware, it may say much without really saying anything at all (How dare you get that fashionista in your life a MACYs giftcard! What do you think she is? Poor?! Unstylish?! Get. A. Clue). A BevMo giftcard is 100x better because it lets the person’s true alcoholic shine through – they can go and pick their poison by themselves without being ashamed. Ummm yes I just used a $50 BevMo giftcard on cheap vodka, peach schnapps, and Skinnygirl cosmo. Yes. Indeed. Cheers to you.
Of course you can go for some fancy, vintage, top shelf alcohol. But lets be honest… we’re talking about a lush here… anything will do the trick! Just saying.
Everytime I see something completely out of my price range, Gwen Stefani’s “Rich Girl” lyrics run through my head… Anyways. Here are some of my Springtime obsessions. Because every classy girl needs a pretty frock, every ManRepeller needs Dannijo jewelry, and KateSpade just makes my world go round.
SIGH. If only.