Do yourself a solid and forgo the Miley Cyrus costume… same to you guys, I’m over the Robin Thicke as Beetlejuice get up. And you nauseating couples doing couples costumes (sidenote: go bury yourselves in a hole together because unless your costume is Grade A, top notch, hilarious shit, I want none of it), don’t even THINK about doing the Miley Cyrus x Robin Thicke duo costume. Seriously. Just. Don’t.
As you know, YOUCANKISSMYSASS is all about promoting healthy images for women and young girls. I am stoutly a feminist, and cringe when ladies frolic around on Halloween and/or use it as an excuse to bare all. I get it, ladies. I really do. This is your time to shine. You’ve been liquid dieting to fit into your corset costume for months, just like you dieted for a trip in Punta Cana. You know whats over (aside from Isabel Marant wedge sneakers – gag)? Halloween costumes that begin with “slutty”. Slutty-cat. Slutty- fairy. Slutty-princess. Slutty-skeleton. Slutty-robot. Slutty-pumpkin. LOLWUT. Last year I poked fun at my immense dislike for Halloween and suggested a few, women empowering costumes. So here’s another go for Halloween 2013 (sarcasm is key here, brahs).
Hillary Clinton is going to be big in 2016. Calling it. Werq that pantsuit!
Abigail Breslin in Little Miss Sunshine. This is one of my favorite movies. Have I re-enacted her Super Freak dance routine? High possibility. But seriously, love this movie, love her routine, love her.
While non-redheads will have trouble channeling the fiery-redhead that is, Ygritte, from Game of Thrones, this still has potential to be a kickass costume. FUR. FUR. AND FUR. that’s all. FUR. and maybe some arrows to legitimize it. Added bonus, as we find out in Season 4, she clearly doesn’t wear anything under all those fur coats, so feel free to go commando baby!
Every girl wants to dress like a Princess. Why not dress up as preggers Kate Middleton?! Polo club attire with a super-fab hat, and youre there. Also, youre DEAD to me if you don’t include the baby bump. THIS IS CRUCIAL.
Debbie Harry. In honor of rock n roll greats with the passing of Lou Reed, why not dress up as a kickass rock and roll leading lady? I’m not talking about Debbie Harry during her Blondie days, I’m talking Debbie Harry circa 2013… Could be fun….
Blerta from Tina Fey’s GIRLS-parodying SNL sketch. This is where the men are separated from the boys. Commit to this one. Granted, only the SNL lovers, and Tina Fey fans will be familiar with Blerta, but if they know…oh they will know. Blerta is the life of the party. Afterall, she lives in Brooklyn.
Notorious RBG AKA Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Like, you don’t have to be completely droll and boring and stick to the judges black coat and white doily with your hair styled in a low bow. Take it up a notch, throw in some hipster wire rimmed glasses, some 2CHAINZ, a grill, maybe some shadez, and Jordans and A CROWN (<– this is imperative) and you got Notorious RBG. DO IT. Relevant, gangsta, and TRILL.
Post sexting-scandal and mayoral race failure, Huma Abedin & Anthony Weiner are surprisingly still together. She reluctantly stands by his side, while he chills all nonchalantly with his hands in his pockets (right? Theyre just in his pockets). Dress up as Weiner (use that
term name loosely, if you know what I mean), and his indifferent wifey. Besides, if you and your dude decide to dress up together – by the end of the night, you’ll probably look just as indifferent as these two do. FOR COUPLES COSTUMES: JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN, DOESN’T MEAN YOU SHOULD.
BONUS JONAS! OTHER COOL RELEVANT COSTUMES!
- Iconic i0s7
- Government shut down
- Royal baby Prince George
Anyways, have a safe and happy Halloween y’all!