Dating Or Apartment Hunting in NYC?


You only survive in New York insofar as you can hustle. The greatest hustles are dating and finding the perfect apartment. It’s all about that grind. Obviously it’s no surprise that at the end of the day they’re pretty much the same thing.

You guys really hit it off the first time you met. He finally calls a week later to let you know he found someone else.

Really, what guy you go on one date with will actually courtesy call you to stop seeing you versus fading you out?

You find out he’s been two timing you when you show up and someone else is there as well.

This actually happened to an ex-coworker of mine. He signed the lease and put the security deposit down for his new spot, got the keys, showed up to take measurements, only to find the realtor he was working with also sold the apartment to another guy as well. (The story ends with him getting his money back and finding another spot).

That “first date” is stressful.

Like does this outfit say I’m trying to hard? Does it make me look like “responsible tenant”? Or more like “pays bills late”? I’m obviously going for the former.

You’re having second thoughts and need to think over your decision to commit for a bit. You call the next day to find out you missed out on an opportunity.

Because everyone is a commitment-phobe.

Y’all had great chemistry. You even offered to do their laundry, clean and cook breakfast occasionally. They just weren’t ready to commit.

I repeat, commitment-phobes. Everbody. It’s NYC. Suck it up and keep on truckin’

Their pictures online look nothing like they do in person.

In dating it can go both ways – you’re either disappointed, or pleasantly surprised. In apartment hunting lets face it, you’re always let down.

And just when you think you found a real connection…

You see they’re back on that Craigslist / Tinder / OkCupid grind, leaving you back on the market. Womp, womp.

Keep looking and keep your options open.

You’ll face a lot of rejection, disappointment, let downs, no shows, etc. But pick yourself back up and keep at it. You’ll find the right one. And when you do, it’s lovely. If anything, looking around keeps your options open, but also shows you everything you DON’T want.

It’s imperative to know the person’s credit score and how much they make annually before considering committing.

It’s all about security. You know? Okay, okay, I’m not vain. This doesn’t apply to dating.

You have a checklist of things you’re looking in a perfect match. You want to make sure you desires, wants and needs are all met.

A lot of people will say they have a dating check list. To that, I say, you’re dumb. I’ve said this time and time again, girls (and fellas) with dating check lists and prerequisites that they are looking for in a significant other really limits you from a wide range of potential suitors. Yes, there are such things as standards, but a list? Nah. Same goes for looking for apartments – If you approach it with a checklist – floor to ceiling windows, West Village, walk in closet – well, you’re just fucking yourself over. Good luck, my friend.

He’ll tell you everything you want to hear, because he only wants one thing.

To get in your pants. Or that commission. Pick your poison baby girl.

At the end of the day, know what you want and be confident in that.

You can let a good opportunity pass by because of your indifference, or wishy-washiness. Trust your instinct and go on that. Don’t settle for anything less than you deserve.


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