Golden Globes Red Carpet Liveblog

Because fashun.

(Also its been two years since LPS and I did this)

  • Ryan Seacrest is wearing his own brand, Distinction. Its not distinct whatsoever and I don’t care. Seacrest is happy about it so whatever.
  • Rosamund Pike in Vera Wang looks like someone took a victorian bedsheet and obsessed over cut outs. Also she had a baby 5 weeks ago?!
  • EDDIE REDMAYNE probably in Burberry and maybe its his recent marriage but I think he lost his freckles and boyish look. I think I’m over him. HIS WEDDING BAND IS JUST GLARING AT ME! Also hes not a read head anymore? Jesus Christ what happened since Les Mis?!

I don’t like the idea of the Stiletto Cam. I don’t care to look at peoples feet.

  • Ethan Hawke looks as if Boyhood continued after his grave. Just kidding. I love the man.
  • Kevin Spacey in “Jos A. Banks”… I see you.
  • Kate Mara is wearing Miu Miu so I’m okay with that.

Giuliana Rancic admitted to “taking a couple sips of champagne”. Thats probably enough to get her sloshed for the rest of the night.

  • LORDE IS INCREDIBLE IN PANTSUIT/CROP TOP AND I’M OBSESSED! Crying? I’m crying. She’s giving me Diane Keaton/Annie Hall realness with a vampy twist.
  • Lena Dunham and Andrew Rannells is LPS and my spirit animal couple.
  • Emily Blunt  looking like a Roman goddess who just went on a 25 day juice fast
  • Jessica Chastain with some Jessica Rabbit
  • Allison Williams looking like shes as old as Peter Pan in Armani Prive. But at second glance it kinda looks like shes part of a mariachi band… or as my friend Dani pointed out, the dancing red dress emoji.
  • Natalie Portman with feathers and butterflies galore looking like she walked out of a Anthropologie ad.
  • JLo looking prime for that MILF porn I guess shes doing where she plays the mom and the young neighbor boy who says “I love your mother’s cookies”. I cringe every time. (SIDENOTE: The Boy Nextdoor / Ryan Guzman is kinda hot)
  • Claire Danes with “actual feathers” on her boobs and shes “wearing art” which is very unlike Carrie Matthison, but jokes aside she looks INCREDIBLE
  • Katherine Heigl wearing Zac Posen which I love, but I don’t love how she thinks her “fuller figure” is so special and noteworthy.
  • Jennifer Aniston’s hair is up and her dress is gorgeous and the WORLD IS RIGHT. The dress looks a bit like “I bought this at Wet Seal” which is a huge insult I’d imagine to YSL, but good lord its Jenn and I love her.
  • Chris Pratt & Anna Farris = relationship goals. Said a 12 year old (or me)
  • Matthew McConaughey IS WEARING A SHADE OF PLUM AND THE FASHUN GAME IS OVER. His wife on the other hand in the Monique Lillet dress, looks like a lamp shade.
  • George Clooney and AMAL looking like a true racially ambiguous Holly Golightly if she could afford Haute Couture.
  • Emma Stone in a jumpsuit I LOVE or according to Seacrest “slacks”… I could do without the giant bow in the back.
  • Kate Hudsons Versace ensemble is a bit too risque for me, but good god I love the woman
  • All i know is that Felicity Jones is Mrs. Hawking in Theory of Everything and that her Christian Dior dress is SLAYING. But also I just remember her in the movie Like Crazy which makes me really sad.
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